Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
by Kellie
Audra has a bad hair day
The
front door banged open followed by a strident, loud and quite perturbed voice.
"MOTHER! MOTHER, WHERE ARE YOU?" Sitting in the study Victoria would have
thought Nick was
experiencing a particularly nasty cold causing his voice to sound feminine if he
hadn't been well
within her view. Usually he was the only one of her children to enter the house
yelling at the top of his voice.
"I'm in the study, dear." Footsteps pounded across the floor and Audra entered
with a flourish. It
was plain to see she was highly agitated. Victoria didn't fail to notice that
her daughter's head was
wrapped in a towel, effectively hiding her beautiful blond tresses. She marched
directly to her
mother and addressed her angrily. Her speech pattern rose and fell with a
swooping emphasis on
certain words.
"Can you BELIEVE Ellen Marshall CONVINCED me to let her try out a NEW tonic on
my HAIR and
quite CONVENIENTLY forgot to tell me there have been some, SOME, adverse
REACTIONS to it?"
"Surely, it can't be all that horrible, dear."
"HORRIBLE doesn't EVEN begin to DESCRIBE what SHE has done to ME. Just LOOK at
my HAIR."
With this Audra swept the towel from her head. Victoria gasped in astonishment.
Unfortunately
Audra had not detected the presence of Nick and Heath in the room but their
booming laughter
brought it to her attention.
"Boy howdy, Sis. If we paint you orange you could pass for a pumpkin."
"Or paint her green to match the hair and she would look exactly like a Brussels
sprout." Both boys
were having a difficult time containing their mirth over their sister's
predicament and there was no
way they would pass up on an opportunity to tease her mercilessly. Audra glared
at them then
turned her attention back to her mother.
"And to make matters WORSE, Ellen says that SOME of the ladies THIS...." Audra
held her hands up
to the sides of her head "......has HAPPENED to have had SOME of their hair FALL
OUT. My social life
is RUINED, absolutely RUINED." Audra glanced searchingly around the room.
"Where's Jarrod?
Surely there is some law pertaining to this type of calamity. I'll teach Ellen
to tell the whole truth
and nothing but the truth before applying her wares on her customers."
"Do I hear a lovely la...........Good Lord, Audra, what in the world has
happened to your hair?"
Although Victoria, Nick and Heath had already heard the explanation once they
listened to it again
to see what Jarrod's reaction would be.
"So, is there anything that can be done legally, Jarrod?" Jarrod silently
pondered his response.
Putting his arm around her shoulders and giving a squeeze he tried a diplomatic
approach. "Honey,
don't you think it would be better to talk to Ellen and ask her to reimburse you
before taking her to
court?"
Audra pouted. "I guess but see if I ever let her touch my hair again."
Victoria
breathed a sigh of relief to see an end to the worst of this situation.
"Come along, dear. Let's try washing your hair several times. Maybe some of the
green will wash out."
"If only I could be so lucky. I'll just cross my fingers that none of my hair
falls out." As they exited the
room Nick couldn't resist getting in one more barb.
"Well, if it does you could always get one of those specially made wigs. You
could even pick out a
color you might like better than your current one." Audra didn't miss what he
meant by current or
his wink to Heath or the snickers from all three of her usually much loved and
adored brothers.
"I just might do that, Nick, if my hair falls out. And I know just the color I
want and where to get it."
Victoria
felt slightly uneasy by the way Audra's eyes narrowed with a touch of the devil
in them. She
re-evaluated her position that the worse was over.
***********
Indeed, by the following week patches of Audra's hair began to fall out. And,
remembering Nick's
suggestion, she set about gathering the materials for and making a perfect wig.
She spent a whole day
working on it and wore it to supper that evening to proudly show it off.
Everyone admired its
beautiful color; it complimented her complexion perfectly.
Victoria
was amazed that Audra had
been able to find everything she needed to craft such a fine wig.
"Audra, where in the world did you find the hair for your wig? It is such a
brilliant and radiant
color." Audra's eyes drifted around the table and lingered on Nick for several
seconds as if she
expected another one of his teasing remarks.
"Oh, I didn't have to go far, not far at all. It is lovely isn't it." Everyone
voiced their agreement and
finishing their meals headed to bed.
**********
Once again the front door to the Barkley home was slammed open and a very loud
and angry voice
bellowed.
"AUDRA! AUDRA, GET YOUR LITTLE FANNY DOWN HERE. NOW!" Victoria, Jarrod and Heath
had
all emerged from various rooms of the house to see Nick furiously pacing in the
foyer. Audra regally,
gracefully and calmly walked down the staircase. Upon seeing her Nick advanced
menacingly in her
direction.
"YOU LITTLE WILDCAT! I'M GONNA TURN YOU OVER MY KNEE FOR THIS STUNT!" The rest
of the
family knew he was serious and just angry enough to do it so they quickly placed
themselves in his
path.
Victoria
tried to calm her son.
"Nicholas, please lower your voice and explain what you are ranting about. What
exactly has Audra
done?"
"What has she done? Well, you see that beautifully colored wig she is wearing?"
Nick waited for each
of them to nod their heads before continuing. "You know how we all wondered
where she found that
hair. Well, I have the answer now. Minding my own business I go the barn and
when I enter
Coco's
stall guess what I find." Victoria and Jarrod groaned aloud, anticipating what
Nick's discovery had
been. "This little minx acquired the hair for her wig by using
Coco's
hair. It's bad enough that she
roached the mane but she cut off every last hair on the tail also. MY HORSE HAS
NO MANE OR TAIL
HAIRS LEFT!" Jarrod closed his eyes and slowly shook his head while Heath was
literally on the floor
in stitches.
Victoria
turned to look at Audra.
"Audra, you didn't."
"I most certainly did. Besides Nick was the one who suggested I pick out a color
I like and
Coco's
mane and tail hair colors are the loveliest I have ever seen. Don't you agree,
Mother?"
Victoria
refused to acknowledge the question, instead trying to soothe all concerned.
"Audra, what came over you? You know better than to do something like this."
"That's right, move aside Mother and I'll tan her hide good."
"Nicholas, you'll do nothing of the sort. I will handle Audra's punishment
myself. I'm sure I can
come up with some particularly unpleasant tasks for her to do." Audra's smug
expression faded, she
had previous experience with her mother's creative forms of punishment and knew
she would truly
regret BORROWING
Coco's mane and tail hairs before all was said and done. Nick was
satisfied
seeing Audra's crestfallen expression.
Once again
Victoria
briefly thought everything was smoothed over until Heath, who had recovered
from his laughing fit, slapped Nick on the back.
"Well, big brother, hate to tell you this but looks like I won't be riding side
by side with you for a
while, especially to town."
"Oh, and why is that?"
"It's bad enough being the town bastard but being seen in the company of a man
riding a bald horse
could ruin what little GOOD reputation I have." Heath wasn't stupid and he was
already out the door
by the time he completed his statement.
"Why you...." Nick gave chase and Victoria shook her head, wondering what Nick
would do to redeem
Coco's reputation.
***********
At breakfast the following morning Jarrod unknowingly stirred the pot.
"Heath, do we have any new saddle horses on the ranch?"
"No, why?"
"Well, I saw Nick head out early this morning but didn't recognize the horse. At
first I thought it was
Coco but the animal's mane and tail were intact and black to boot. That horse
sure did move like
Coco, even seemed to be the same in conformation." Heath's fork hit his plate
with a clang and
Jarrod looked up just in time to glimpse his youngest brother's backside scoot
out of the dining
room. It seemed like he had only been gone for a few seconds when he burst into
the house and
grabbed his hat and vest.
Victoria
was beginning to wonder if her children had lost their minds.
"Heath, sweetheart, where are you going in such a hurry?" He barely glanced at
her as he headed out
the door.
"Me and Nick gotta have a little talk."
Jarrod walked to the door and watched Heath's departure. Victoria never could
say why she asked
since she already knew the answer. "Jarrod, is Charger......"
Jarrod replied before she even finished the question. "Afraid so Mother, he's
definitely BALD all
right."
Victoria
hated the thought of having to smooth another confrontation when she heard
horses charge
onto the property late in the afternoon. She shouldn't have worried. Although
both Nick and Heath
had some bruises and minor cuts on their faces, they entered the house with
their arms thrown
around each other's shoulders. Apparently they had made their own peace and all
she had to do was
clean their cuts. She threw in some scolding about brothers fighting each other,
just for good
measure.
**********
As Nick and Heath headed upstairs to clean up for supper Victoria's curiosity
got the better of her
and she just had to go see the damage rendered to the two horses for herself.
Charger and
Coco's
stalls were side by side and
Victoria
stood looking at the two pitiful creatures until her laughter
caused tears to roll down her cheeks.
"It is rather amusing, isn't it?" Victoria spun around to see Jarrod standing at
the barn doors.
"Yes, it is. I feel sorry for these two, though. Poor, innocent victims of one
bad day with the hair dresser." Jarrod laughed heartily.
"Where are you headed with a bedroll, son?"
"Well, Mother, Jingo is too faithful, loyal, distinguished and old to suffer the
fate of
Coco and
Charger. I believe he has earned the right to live ALL his remaining days with
dignity and a bald horse is definitely not dignified. Heath has just
enough of the devil in him to pull a Nick and Audra so I have decided three
weeks of fishing at the cabin are in order. By then
Coco and
Charger will have enough hair grown in that Jingo should be safe." Jarrod winked
at his mother, mounted Jingo and headed in the direction of what would be his
horse's "safe house" for the next three weeks.
*****End*****