College Years
Part One - Bittersweet Goodbyes
They sat under a tree in the school yard. Fifteen year old Adam and his best friend, seventeen-year-old Judy. They had pretty much grown up together, meeting on the wagon train heading west when Adam was just a boy. They had been separated for a few years when Judy continued the journey with her father, but were reconnected when Judy’s father married and they moved back to Virginia City. They shared a lunch as Adam watched his younger brother playing tag with his schoolmates.
“So, after graduation this year, am I going to see you again?” Judy asked studying him closely for a response.
“Of course you will, we can visit each other on the weekends. Things won’t change that much; we have all summer together.”
“Yes, but then I plan to leave for college in the fall. We won’t be able to visit then; I’ll be too far away.”
“Yes, but we can write. Just because you’re going East, that doesn’t mean we can’t talk anymore. You’re just going to Boston, not Egypt.”
“Adam! You seem to be taking this so lightly. I am your best friend; I would think you would be a little more upset about this. Graduation is in only three weeks, then only a few months until I leave for Boston.”
“I’m not taking it lightly; you are my best friend. I just don’t see a point in worrying over it now. Why don’t you meet me tomorrow by the lake around noon. We can take a ride, walk, talk, whatever you wanna do.”
“What about our fathers? You know they don’t want us to be alone together.”
“Never stopped us before. What are ya? Chicken!”
“Adam Cartwright you take that back or I’ll pound you!”
“I’d like to see you try.”
“Alright, have it your way!”
Judy pinched Adam hard on the arm. He winced and pulled his arm away, giving her hair a soft tug.
“OOOWWW, Why you…” Judy yelled, putting on a dramatic show. Instantly, her mind floated back to her childhood. The times she and Adam had played Cowboys and Indians, Cops and Robbers and other rough house games. She turned around and put him in a headlock, holding him tightly as he tried to wrestle out of her hold. He was laughing now, as was she. He escaped from his headlock, forgetting where he was he pushed her shoulders to the ground pinning her with his weight.
“ADAM CARTWRIGHT, LET HER UP IMMEDIATELY!”
Adam released his hold and stood up quickly dusting off his clothes. He met the eyes of his teacher Mrs. Kindle. Her eyes were furious, her hair which rested in a bun, seemed to bob around as she shook to control her anger.
“JUST WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING?!”
A small crowd formed around the spot Adam stood. Judy was standing now also, brushing the dust off of her dress, and righting her hair ribbons.
“Um, we were just….just….joshing around!”
“JUST JOSHING AROUND! I see; perhaps you would like to stay after school today and do a paper on the proper etiquette when confronted by a lady.”
“Yes ma’am.”
“Children, back inside. Recess is over!”
Adam stood and watched everyone file in front of him. He knew he would be in trouble arriving late to the Ponderosa. He felt a small shove from behind, as Judy filed past him into the school. She turned flashing him her best ‘I’m sorry’ smile as she walked backwards towards the entrance. In spite of the knots building in his stomach, he smiled back.
***********
Adam mounted his horse, giving his teacher one last look of contempt as he headed towards home. He had endured an hour-long lecture, then had to spend the rest of the time completing the essay his teacher had assigned. After handing it in, she looked it over carefully, and began another lecture on using the brains that the good Lord had given him.
“Adam, you’re late. Hoss said you were kept after school. I thought I would wait for you to tell me what happened.”
“I got kept after school, Pa.”
“Yes, we established that. I would like to know the reason why.”
“Well, we were at lunch, I was watching Hoss play tag. Judy and I started talking, that led to goofing off and I got into trouble. I had to stay after school and write a paper to make up for it.”
“Goofing off, in what way.”
Adam sighed; he was hoping to avoid that part of the story. He felt the knots tighten in his stomach as he forced himself to meet his father’s eyes.
“We um….well….we were just playing around Pa!”
“ADAM!”
“We were wrestling a bit.”
“Wrestling a bit! With a girl. Adam, I raised you better than that. I know you two are friends, but there has to be a line drawn somewhere. Maybe it is time you and Judy tried finding other friends, separate yourselves from each other for a bit.”
“PA, I have other friends. We were just messing around. I don’t know why you think Judy is such trouble for me to be around.” Adam was trying hard to keep his anger in check. His father had been trying to keep him and Judy apart for years; he didn’t understand the nature of their relationship.
“That is the problem, Adam; she is seventeen years old. She is a lady now, not someone to roll around in the dirt with. I am not saying you can’t maintain your friendship, I just want you to branch out.”
“I know she is a lady; she is also my best friend, practically my sister. You act like it is wrong for us to be together. I don’t understand it, Pa!”
“Son, I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret. You are both young, I just don’t want anything to happen that could change the course of your life.”
“Nothing’s gonna happen; we’re just friends! I have chores to finish. Can I go?”
“Adam, I just want you to be careful.”
“I know, Pa. Are we finished?”
“Go ahead, son, start your chores.” Ben stepped aside as his son walked past him. He worried that his relationship with Judy would lead to trouble in one way or another. He sighed as he knew speaking with Adam about it now would be useless; he was blinded. He knew in time Adam would come around, listen to reason. He just would have to wait for that moment; he just hoped it wasn’t too late.
***********
Slipping out of his window and jumping onto the logs he had cut earlier, he quietly crept towards the barn. He gave one last glance at his father‘s window and paused, listening for movement, or any clue that his father may still be awake. Satisfied that he was in the clear, he ran to the barn, saddled his horse quickly, and walked him out of hearing range of the house. Mounting him quietly, he pushed the horse into a trot, relishing in the darkness that surrounded him.
“Adam, I wasn’t sure you would still come. Did you get in big trouble with your Pa?” Judy asked as she met Adam at the lake as they had agreed.
“Just a lecture on the nature of our relationship, of course.”
“Oh really, and just what is the nature of our relationship?”
“Well, I always considered you the scrawny big eyed little girl who spent her time following me around like a lost pup.” Adam laughed as he watched his friend’s face brighten to red.
“You are the one that follows me around you prickly, stubborn buffoon!”
“And for that little lady, you can go for a swim.”
Judy screamed as Adam picked her up and flung her into the water. He followed right after her, waiting for her to surface so he could dunk her underneath. Soon they were splashing and wrestling like the children they once were. Finally tiring, Adam lifted her out of the water, then joined her on the bank, resting on their backs and breathing heavily.
“Adam, I don’t want this to end. What if I stayed here, forgot about college?”
“Sure, your Pa’d go for that!” Adam laughed as he squeezed his shirt out over the top of her.
“STOP THAT, YOU BRUTE! Anyway, you’re right; my father would have my hide. It took him almost all of his life to save up the money to send me. I do owe it to him to go.”
“You owe it to yourself to go. There’s not much for you around here. You always talked about becoming an editor. You should pursue that dream, Boston or New York would be perfect to achieve it.”
“I would like to become an editor; it’s just so hard to leave this all behind.”
“You’ll be fine; you’ll make other friends. In a few years, I’ll be headed to college too, if I can talk my Pa into it. Hey, maybe we will meet up again there, if you haven’t moved on by then.”
“Of course we’ll meet up again; that’s not the problem. I don’t want other friends, Adam; I only want you.”
Their eyes met, Adam felt butterflies flutter through his stomach. Her eyes were staring into his; he felt himself blush at their intensity. She leaned forward; his lips ached to meet hers. They were only friends; sure they had kissed a few times, but only friendly pecks meant for a game. He felt different now; leaning forward, he paused feeling her breath on his lips before their mouths connected. This kiss was not playful, it was firm, passionate. Their lips parted; Judy felt herself moan. Soon their tongues were meshed, dueling with each other. Soaked from their impromptu swim, Adam found himself laying on top of Judy, supporting himself with one hand on the ground, their body heat rising through the dampness of their clothes. Adam felt himself swell at this closeness; he had an urge to take her right there. He felt her hands on his belt buckle, aching for more. His mind wandered to the lecture he had received the night before. “I just don’t want you to do something you’ll regret.” His father’s voice echoed in his head.
“Judy, stop. We
can’t do this.” Adam rolled off of her quickly, breathing heavily, trying to
slow his heartbeat.
“I don’t know what happened. I…”
“I know, Judy, neither do I. Let’s just forget about it, take a walk.”
“Yes, I could use some fresh air.”
They walked side by side, neither knowing what to say. They were both still flush from their brief interlude, working on catching their breath.
“When you’re in college, meeting new friends, learning about the culture, enjoying yourself, do you think it may change you in some way?” Adam asked finally breaking the silence.
“We all change in some ways, I guess. What exactly are you asking?”
“What I mean is, when you are there, looking back on this place, on us, will you have any regrets?”
“Regrets? Maybe just one -- that I can’t bring this part of the world with me. Look around you, Adam, the land that belongs to your family. I will regret not hearing the birds singing, the leaves blowing in the trees, the call of the wild. But, one thing I will miss the most, I can bring with me.”
“What’s that?”
“You. I will have our memories. We will write, everyday. I won’t forget you, Adam, and I will never regret a moment of the time we spend together, now or ever.”
Adam slipped his hand in to hers, feeling no need to reply. They had always been comfortable in their silence.
The sun began to set, and the two shifted their hold as she laid her head on his chest. They knew their time was coming to an end. Watching the blue water begin to fade into the darkness, the sun casting the clouds into bursts of orange and pink, Adam released his hold.
“Goodbye Adam; I will see you on Monday. Thanks for spending the afternoon, well, and evening as it turned out. Will your father wonder where you’ve been?”
“I told him I was going out on the land. He probably assumed to be alone. But, I better be getting back before he sends Hoss to find me! See you Monday.”
He turned quickly, and their lips met. It seemed so natural, it just happened. Both eyes opened wide in surprise, then slipped into laughter.
“Bye!” Adam said smiling and walking away. He whistled a tune on his way back towards the ranch house. He could hear his brother Little Joe shouting with his brother Hoss, engrossed in some game. He saw his step-mother Marie tending her garden on the side of the house. He felt a pull, realizing now that time moved much faster than anyone could keep up with. His best friend would soon be gone, his brothers grown up. He looked into the scene, trying to etch every bit of it into his memory; soon that would be all he had left.
“Boys, time for supper. Go wash up,” Marie called to her sons, noticing Adam leaning against the wall of the barn watching his brother’s play. The three headed towards the house, Adam following slowly behind his brothers.
“Guess what, Pa -- me and Hoss is gonna catch some lizards, train ‘em to do tricks.” Little Joe said, scooting his food around on his plate.
“Eat your food, Joseph, don’t play with it. What exactly are you going to train these lizards to do?”
“See, Pa, me and the boys were talking at school. Tommy said that he had a lizard that would roll over on command. Reckon we could teach a lizard to do that,” Hoss said reaching for seconds.
“YEAH!”
“Boys, I doubt that a lizard can learn tricks, but I see no harm in trying. Adam, are you planning on helping your brothers on this venture?”
“Huh?”
“Son, you’re awfully quiet this evening.”
“Sorry, Pa, guess I’m just tired.”
“Something on your mind?”
“No, Pa. Just not much in the mood for socializing I guess.”
Ben gave Adam a worried glance, wondering if all Adam had done was ride the fence line this day. He knew they needed to talk -- sooner than later -- and he tried to make his expression passive as he suggested a trip to the lake. “I see. I was thinking, tomorrow after church you and I could go up to Apache Creek, do some fishing.”
“YEAH FISHING!”
“No, Little Joe, you and Hoss are going with your mother to get some new shoes and clothes at the mercantile. Adam and I will be going fishing.”
“AW, PA, I WANT’S TO GO FISHIN WITH YOU AND ADAM!”
“Joseph, that’s enough. Finish your dinner!”
“Yes, Mon Petit, we will have a good time tomorrow. We can even get some of your favorite treats in town. How does a bag of peppermints sound?” Marie offered, hoping to avoid conflict between her youngest and his father.
“Yeah, Joe, we’ll have as good a time as Adam and Pa, you’ll see.” Hoss interjected, dreading tension at the dinner table.
Joe continued staring at his plate, pushing the food around with his fork.
“So what about it, Adam? A day of fishing with your Pa?”
“Sounds good. I wanted to talk to you about adding an additional room to the ranch house. Can I bring my drawings along?”
“Of course, son. It’s settled then.”
***********
Sitting through church services was harder than usual. Adam had seen Judy that morning, but instead of sitting behind him as she normally did, her father led her to the far side of the room. He wondered why the sudden change; they had sat this way for as long as he cared to remember. Now he worried that maybe Judy’s father had somehow found out about the visit they had yesterday afternoon. He was restless, shifting in his seat. He felt the sudden squeeze of his father’s hand on his shoulder, a warning he knew to settle down and pay attention. Adam blushed. He hated being treated like a child; he should not have to be reminded how to behave in church. He refocused his attention on the sermon, but found himself glancing once again in the direction his friend was sitting. He caught her glance, and their eyes met. She batted her eyes at him, a smile on her features. He felt himself relax, and returned a warm smile. That smile soon turned to a frown as he saw his father move Joe to his other side and motion for Adam to sit next to him. The look on his father’s face was one that would allow no argument. Adam slid next to his father, easing all emotion out of his face as he normally did when he was embarrassed, and focused once again on the sermon.
After service had ended, Ben made his rounds, allowing Adam a chance to escape. He made his way to Judy, and poked her roughly in the shoulder to get her attention. She spun on him with a sharp stare, then realizing who it was that had handled her in such a manner, flashed a smile. He motioned her quietly away from her father and led her outside.
“What was that about?”
“What?” She giggled, knowing exactly what he meant but enjoying the exasperated look in his eyes.
“Why’d you sit away from us?”
“Oh, that. Well my father is working on a deal with the Morrison’s; he wanted to sit near them so they couldn’t slip away after services.”
“Isn’t that a little sinful, bringing business into a church?”
“Who are we to talk about sinful?” Judy smiled, pushing him softly backwards, then drawing him to her by the waist.
“There you are, brother; Pa told me to fetch ya.” Hoss stood, his face full of teasing laughter, as he caught his brother and his brother’s best friend in a rather awkward position.
“I’ll be right there.” Adam said, keeping his cool, but scooting away from Judy to a safer distance. “See you tomorrow, Judy.”
“Bye, Adam.” Judy smiled as he walked away. She felt the urge to rush after him, realizing that the nature of their relationship was under question.
***********
“Bet the fish are biting good today, Pa; it’s the right weather for it.” Adam was trying his best to keep their conversation from drifting to his behavior in church that morning.
“We’ll soon find out. Looks like a good spot over there, a little shade to keep the sun off our backs.”
“Sure, Pa.”
“Adam, I wanted to ask you where you went to when church ended today.”
“Just outside to get some air. Look at that, Pa, already got a nibble.” Adam smiled, but inside his stomach was going tighter; he knew he needed to act fast to get out of this conversation. “Pa, do you remember when we were going through Illinois? We went swimming in that pond. There were so many fish in there, they were nibbling our toes.”
“I sure do; you were fit to be tied. I would have thought those were sharks the way you were trying to climb up me.” Ben laughed, his mind floating back to the days when Adam was so young. There were troubles then sure, but it seemed less than that of his son now becoming a man.
“I didn’t know what it was, Pa; it felt like little fingers trying to pull me in. You didn’t help much; you were as jittery as I was. I don’t remember much about Illinois Pa. Where did we stay there?”
Adam’s eyes shone relief as his father started in on the tale of their travels through Illinois. He smiled at the thought of keeping score: Adam one, Pa zero. With any luck, he could keep him talking of other things the whole afternoon.
“You got a bite there, son. Planning on catching any fish today, or just feeding them.”
Adam looked up, stunned; he was so absorbed in the tale told by his father he didn’t feel the tug on the line. He quickly pulled the fish in. It was a good size; he strung it up on the line, realizing his father must have caught two while he was telling the story.
“We should probably head back soon; the sun is starting to set. Your mother will be worried if we aren’t home by dark.”
“You’re right; let’s load up. Those are mighty fine fish you caught there, Pa; funny I didn’t even notice. I can’t believe I don’t remember much of those days; then again, I guess I was only four.”
“That you were, son. You were always a responsible lad, dependable. I never could have made this journey without you.”
“Pa, thanks for doing this. I know you’re busy.”
“I’d like to do it more often; it doesn’t seem like we have much time to just talk anymore. You know, if you ever need to talk to me, I am here. Just because I am busy doesn’t mean I am not interested in the happenings of your life.”
Adam frowned, looking out over the water. He felt guilty; he didn’t want to make this trek with his father today, worried about his intentions. He did want to talk to him, but he wanted it to be on his own terms. He realized his father had done just that. He hadn’t poked or prodded him at all; he was just enjoying their time together.
“When did you know you were in love with my mother?”
Ben stopped loading the wagon and glanced at his son. He was hoping this would happen, that maybe Adam would open up a little. “It wasn’t right away; we were friends a long time before. As you know, I worked under the command of her father. I guess it happened gradually, both of us seeming to realize there was something more between us when I docked after a long bout at sea. We had a picnic, spent some time together and our feelings turned from friendship to love.”
“What did you do then? You didn’t go back out to sea?”
“No, I stayed behind, worked for your Grandfather when he started his own business. You were born soon after.”
“Did she ask you to stay, not to go back to sea?”
“No, she said she knew I would do what I had to; she would understand. She said she would wait for me. But, I couldn’t leave her, not when I loved her so much.”
Adam stared thoughtfully at his father for some time. Ben headed to his horse and mounted, hoping for more conversation. Looking at Adam and realizing his eyes were still on him, he knew instantly that there would be no more. He saw the look of ponderance in his son’s eyes, and knew he would now spend his time in thought. He often did this as a young child -- asked a hard question, then spent days mulling over its answer.
*********
“So, how did the day with Adam go?” Marie asked her husband as he slid into bed beside him.
“We had a good time, spent most of it reminiscing. He did ask when I knew I was in love with Elizabeth, how it came about.”
“And you told him.”
“Of course. How could I not? I told him how it was; in doing so, I realized how alike Adam and Judy’s relationship is with my and Elizabeth’s. We weren’t much older than they are now.”
“Oh Ben, I don’t think it is right for a child as young as Adam to dream about love already. He’s only fifteen. How are we going to get through to him?”
“With Adam, I have learned that he will have to come through this on his own terms. Any pushing on our part will just turn him inward. At least he is asking questions now, maybe not about himself, but questions all the same. I am just going to have to make myself more available to him. I’ve known for a long time that this may happen; those two have always been so close. I thought I would be better prepared for when it happened, but I am not.”
“You’re right about him coming through it on his own terms; he still is sometimes awkward with me. I no longer think he resents me, but sometimes I wonder what he thinks of me.”
“Adam is hard to read, always has been; even as a child he was quick to hide his emotions. That is why I am so worried about him. How are we to really know what’s going on between he and Judy?”
“All we can do is pray -- pray that he makes the right choices, and doesn’t end up with a broken heart.”
***********
He lay awake thinking about what he and his father had spoken about. His mother would have let his father leave, even though they knew their love was deep. Could he let Judy leave, now that he knew how he felt about her? He couldn’t stop thinking about her, her smile, her hair. He thought about the few weeks before graduation, and this summer being their last together. He felt sick; thinking of not being able to see her made him ache in a way he never had before. In his mind, visions played through his head -- them swimming together as children, running through the woods. Their first kiss when he was only nine. He drifted to sleep, still feeling her lips on his.
**********
“Adam, you getting up this morning? Hop Sing’s downstairs hollering; you missed breakfast.” Hoss stood over his brother who was still sleeping. His father had sent him up to check on him; if he wasn’t up soon, he would be late for school.
“Huh, what time is it?”
“It’s after six; we gotta get to school. I did most of your chores this morning when you didn’t come down. Thought maybe you were sick.”
“No, I’m not sick, musta just overslept. You say you did my chores?”
“Most of ‘em. You best get dressed if we’re gonna make it to school on time.”
“I would get up and get ready if you would give me a minute. Not much I can do with you standing there gawking at me.”
Hoss laughed, realizing his brother was not wearing his night clothes. He hardly ever did unless it was extremely chilly outside. It drove his father nuts, him sleeping without his bed clothes.
“Right, sorry Adam. Good thing it was me came up here and not Pa; you’d get a lecture on going to bed properly dressed.” Hoss laughed and dogged a pillow thrown by his brother. It hit the side of the door, and Hoss stepped out of the room, closing the door loudly, still laughing.
Adam dressed quickly, taking his time with shaving. His father had given him a razor last year when the first sign of a dark beard shone on his young face. He grabbed his books and ran downstairs, hoping he would make it on time.
“DON’T RUN IN THE HOUSE!” Ben chided as his son flew passed him and out the door to where Hoss was waiting with his horse all ready to go.
“Thanks, Hoss,” Adam said, mounting his horse quickly and kicking her into a gallop.
“DON’T GALLOP IN THE YARD!” Ben yelled, standing on the porch hoping to catch Adam before he left.
They arrived to school just as the teacher rang the bell. They were greeted with a stern look, but were able to take their seats without a lecture. Judy met Adam’s eyes and winked. He returned the gesture, and pulled out his work from the night before. He was searching for his math assignment; he could swear he had left it in his book. He felt something hit his arm, then heard it hit the floor. It was a ball of paper. He bent to retrieve it and opened it slowly, trying not to gain the attention of his teacher.
Adam,
Can you meet me after school today?
Your Best Friend
Judy
Adam smiled and turned to look at her. Underneath her writing he wrote:
Can’t, Pa’s got me out checking the property line, looking for strays. Why, is it important?
He tossed the paper back to her, wincing when it made a sound hitting the floor. The teacher glanced towards their section, but only for a moment before she returned to making notes on the blackboard.
She wrote underneath his neat scrawl:
What about tonight, after dark?
He saw the paper coming and caught it. His friend Jamie let out a soft snicker as the two continued this charade.
Adam returned:
A little after midnight, you better be awake. If I get caught, Pa’ll tan me good. You think you’re worth a good tanning?
She smiled and quickly wrote:
I imagine I am worth at least ten good tannings. I will be awake, climb up the trellis to my window.
Adam wadded up the paper and stuffed it into his pocket. He sat through the rest of class, listening intently to the lesson on the first ships to discover America.
***********
“Hey Adam, will you play lasso with me and the boys. I told them you were the best with a rope, Johnny brought his along today.”
“Sure, Hoss, let’s show ‘em how it’s done.” Adam followed his younger brother to stand with his group of friends. He saw Judy talking with her girlfriends by the steps to the school. He held the rope, and swung it evenly, catching the small tree growing to the side of the school. The boys cheered; he handed the rope to Hoss for a try. Hoss gave a few attempts, nearly catching the tree, but missing all the same. The rope was passed around so everyone could have a try. When it came back to Adam, he took a few steps towards the steps where Judy was still engrossed in conversation. He raised the rope above his head, spinning it with expertise. He threw the rope, capturing Judy, and yanking it tight. Judy let out a surprised yelp, then saw Adam holding the other end.
“Adam Cartwright, you let me go this instant!”
The group of boys laughed and shouted as Adam pulled the rope tighter, forcing Judy towards him.
“ADAM!”
“The teachers comin’!” one of the boys hollered. Adam released the pressure, and Judy tried to free herself quickly, but it was too late.
“Adam Cartwright, did we not talk about this foolish behavior just last week?”
“Ma’am, it was an accident, really. I was just fooling around with the rope…”
“Not another word. I expect you to stay after school today. We are going to have a talk. Then I will be sending a note with you for your father. This behavior will not be tolerated at my school. Now go inside; you will finish your lunch period there.”
“Yes ma’am.” Adam handed the rope to Hoss; he had pulled it back to him and wound it up during the conversation. He headed for the building and took his seat, sinking down low. Being kept after school again would surely earn him trouble. He wondered what exactly that note would say.
**********
“Class dismissed. Adam, remain where you are please.”
Everyone filed for the door. Hoss turned and gave his older brother a sympathetic smile. He also knew that their father would not be happy about this; his eyes threatened tears as he worried for his brother.
“Adam, I would like to know why you continue this behavior, after we have already had a discussion about it.”
“I’m sorry, Ma’am.”
“That is not an answer!”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“I believe you know exactly what to say. Judy and your relationship has always been questionable. You are both too young to begin courting. I think it is time you two went your separate ways. Judy will be graduating in two weeks, then she’ll be off for college. Since your schooling is now becoming affected by your relationship, I recommend you end it now.”
“Judy and I have been friends for years. It is no business of yours as to the extent of our relationship, Mrs. Kindle.”
“It becomes my business when you set that type of example for my students. I can’t have the boys in my class picking on the girls. You are older than most of these boys; they look up to you. I will not put up with this type of activity. If it happens again you will find yourself suspended, which is exactly what I wrote in this note to your father!”
“SUSPENDED!”
“Yes, suspended. I recommend you do some thinking about that before returning to my classroom tomorrow. One more misstep from you and you will be suspended. That is the end of this conversation; see to it that your father gets this note.”
Adam stood up, grabbing the note from her hand. Not meeting her eyes, he turned and stormed out of the building. Mounting his horse, he thought about throwing out the note; thinking better of it, he stuffed the note into his pocket.
**********
“Hoss, where’s your brother?” Ben asked as Hoss walked quietly into the house. “I only heard one horse ride up.”
“He got kept after school again, Pa,” Hoss said, his head down, studying his shoes.
“KEPT AFTER SCHOOL AGAIN! What was the reason this time, and it better not be something between he and Judy.”
“It was, Pa. We were just playing a game -- Johnny brought his lasso to school. I told him Adam was the best at it; we started playing. Then Adam roped Judy while she was standing with her friends. Mrs. Kindle came outside, probably from all the commotion, told Adam to stay after school for a discussion. He didn’t mean nothing by it, Pa; we was just horsing around.”
“I TOLD THAT BOY HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH JUDY WOULD LEAD TO TROUBLE. Being kept after school two days in a row! Well, I guarantee we’ll have a little talk when he gets home!”
Hoss stood staring at the floor waiting to be dismissed. He saw the anger in his father, and once again hoped his brother would take the long way home.
**********
Adam arrived home to the smell of dinner. He cared for his horse, then headed toward the house. The last thing he needed was to endure a lecture from Hop Sing for missing two meals in one day. He washed up quickly, then quietly slid into his seat at the table. He was met with sympathetic eyes from both his brothers as well as Marie, and a ferocious glare from his father. They joined hands for prayer, and Adam swore he could hear his heart beat pounding above the prayer. The meal was spent in silence; the tension could be cut with a knife. Soon everyone had finished, and were dismissed from the table. Adam set out to start his chores, knowing he was in trouble also for not completing his extra work that day.
“Adam, do you have something you need to tell me?” Ben walked up behind his son who was readying to clear the stalls.
“Pa, I’m sorry I was late. I’ll catch up on my chores tomorrow, ride the fence line, and look for strays.”
“That is not what I meant!”
“I know, Pa; here’s a note from Mrs. Kindle. I’m really sorry.”
Ben read the note, his frown growing deeper by the sentence. Adam felt the heat rising to his cheeks, and knew he was flushing red.
“SUSPENDED! YOU HAVE BEEN THREATENED WITH SUSPENSION! THAT IS IT! YOU ARE NO LONGER TO SPEND TIME WITH JUDY, EITHER AT SCHOOL, OR ON THIS PROPERTY! IF YOU CANNOT CONTROL YOURSELF, YOU MAY NOT SEEK HER COMPANY!”
Adam swallowed hard; his father had already started unbuckling his belt.
“THIS IS BEHAVIOR I WILL NOT ACCEPT. YOU KNOW BETTER. NOW TURN AROUND!”
Adam’s eyes filled with tears, flowing over by the blows to his backside inflicted by his father.
**********
He lay in bed waiting for the clock to strike twelve. He was still upset over the tanning he received that evening, and now felt he needed to see Judy more than ever. She could always make him feel better. He heard the chime, and quickly jumped out of bed, still dressed in the clothes he had worn throughout the day. He made his way onto the roof, and jumped down onto the wood pile he had stacked extra high that evening. He walked to the barn retrieving his horse, then walked her quietly out of hearing range of the house. He mounted, and kicked her into a gallop, heading straight to Judy’s small ranch. It was a good ride; he made it their quickly. He knew he was later than he should be, but his father had been up late that night working on the books. He tied his horse up to a tree a distance away from her house, then climbed the trellis as he had many times before. He tapped gently on the window three times as was their code. He saw her shadow move towards him and open the window.
“Adam, I didn’t think you were coming!” she said whispering and pulling him into the room.”
“Just a little late, had to wait on Pa to settle down.”
She watched Adam wince as he set in her hard winged back chair. “Oh Adam, you’re hurt. Was it awful?”
Adam didn’t speak right away; he was upset, but didn’t quite know how to answer that question. Should he say he was fine, or tell her the truth?
“Awful -- I don’t know if that is the right word for it. Uncomfortable I could say. Judy, she told me if I was in trouble again I would be suspended from school.”
“SUS….suspended,” Judy quieted herself quickly, then listened for the sound of her father stirring.
“Pa said I wasn’t to see you anymore, at all. I was to avoid you at school, and we could no longer see each other outside of school either.”
“He said that? Adam, what are we going to do? You’re my best friend; I can’t imagine not seeing you.”
“Well, I’ve thought it over, and I think you were right.”
“Right about what Adam?”
“About you being worth ten tannings. I won’t stop seeing you, no matter what. We can still talk during lunch, and on the weekends we will meet at the lake. It may be secretive, but I don’t care.”
“Oh Adam, I hate having to sneak around that much. If you get caught, you know your father will come down hard on you, and mine on me also. But, we have such a short time left together before I leave for school, and I want us to have more time together. We’ll do it, Adam; we’ll just have to be careful.”
“Judy, promise me we’ll keep in touch when you leave, write everyday like you promised.”
“Of course I will. Everyday. I couldn’t stand it not to.” She sat down on his lap and threw her arms around his neck. He returned her embrace, then lifted her chin until her eyes met his. He leaned in slowly, their lips meeting. The kiss was long and slow. Running out of breath, Judy leaned away from him. He sighed deeply, and stood, picking her up in his arms and lying her on the bed.
“I have to go. It’s a long ride back. Not gonna get much sleep tonight. I think we should play it safe at school tomorrow, maybe not spend time together, at least until this whole thing blows over. I’ll meet you again here, tomorrow night, same time.”
“Okay Adam, please be careful. I don’t know if you should be riding all that way alone at night.”
“I’ll be fine; I could do it in my sleep, which may be exactly what I do!”
***********
Adam awoke; he felt he had only just slipped into bed. His eyes stung with lack of sleep; he rubbed them fiercely. After shaving and dressing, he made his way downstairs. He was too tired to eat, so skipping breakfast, he headed out to complete his morning chores. He had to work fast, having extra chores to make up for.
“Adam, you ready to ride?”
“Just gotta grab my books,” Adam said through a yawn.
“Well, dad burn it, hurry up, you know you can’t be late!”
“I’m goin,’ I’m goin’! Since when did my little brother become my mother?”
“Keep talking like that and you’ll ride to school alone, big brother.”
Adam laughed and clapped Hoss on the shoulder. He quickly grabbed his things and headed out the door.
They arrived to school with little time to spare. Adam quickly took his seat in the back of the room, tapping gently on Judy’s desk as he walked by. She covered a yawn, then turned to smile at him quickly before Mrs. Kindle turned to face the class.
“Today, I would like you to pair off into groups of two. I would like you and your partner to draw a map of the world as it would look according to the belief that the world was flat. Be sure to picture it as Columbus would have thought it to be. You will be graded on your ability to place the countries correctly, and your penmanship. Older students pair with the younger students please.
Adam slid next to Hoss; he, being only nine, was considered a younger student.
“Hey Adam, this’ll be fun won’t it, us working together like this.”
“Sure will; you remember the names of the ocean’s we need to write down?”
“I was kinda hopin' you did; I ain’t too good with remembering all those names of all those places.”
“Yeah, I know, that’s why I partnered with you. We can’t get a bad grade with Pa in the mood he’s in. Here, I’ll start with America, then work our way East.”
“Sounds good, brother; if ya want, you tell me the names and I’ll write ’em in.”
“That’s the plan. Here, write America, A-M-E-R-I-C-A. Good job, buddy; your hand writing has really improved.”
“Ma’s been working with me at night. She has real pretty hand writing.”
They worked together diligently for the next hour. Adam glanced around after they had finished, noticing most of the groups struggling to finish. He had always been interested in Geography, so he had little trouble remembering what country went where; he would then spell out the name of each to his brother who would write it in carefully. He caught Judy’s eye, and gave her a wink as he stretched out in his desk, knocking his map to the floor. She bent to retrieve it, taking a long glance and memorizing where some of the countries were placed and handed it back to him. She quickly began filling in what information she could remember from her quick glance at his paper.
“Adam, you letting her cheat?” Hoss asked his blue eyes open wide as he watched her quickly fill in the answers.
“No, I knocked the map off; she was just politely handing it back to me. You know cheating’s wrong; I would never do that.” Adam gave his brother his best innocent smile, hoping to cover his lie.
“Oh, guess you’re right. Hey, after school you want to go up to Mill Creek, catch some frogs or something?”
“Sure, Hoss, sounds good to me. I’m not in any hurry to get home, Pa being upset with me.”
“Are you boys finished with your assignment?” Mrs. Kindle stood above their desks, glaring down at Adam.
“Yes ma’am. We’re finished.” Adam said meeting her glare with one of his own.
“Then sit quietly while the other’s finish!”
“Yes ma’am.” Hoss said placing a hand on his brother’s arm and squeezing tightly. “Adam, you gotta be more careful with Mrs. Kindle there, she’s liable to kick you right out of school.”
“I didn’t say anything wrong; I answered her.”
“It weren’t you; it was your eyes. You know she’s been watching you all day, like she’s just a waitin’ for you to mess up.”
“Well, half the day’s over already, only a few hours to go. I’ll be fine.”
**********
Hoss and Adam sat under the oak tree eating the lunch that Hop Sing had prepared for them. Hoss would not leave Adam’s side as he was worried his brother would find himself trouble again.
“You just make sure you keep tabs on that temper of yours. Can’t imagine what Pa would do if’n you got suspended from school.”
Adam raised his eyebrows at this observation, as he too wondered what would be in store for him; he surely didn’t plan to find out.
**********
“Lookie there, brother, that’s a right fat frog, we gotta catch that one!” Hoss hollered, pointing to a large frog sitting on the bank of the creek.
“I got ’em!” Adam hollered as he jumped belly down, catching the frog between his hands.
“Can we keep it?” Hoss bounced excitedly, lying on his belly next to his brother, eyeing the frog between his hands.
“How we gonna get him home?”
“Should a brought Little Joe; he usually sticks ’em down his pants.”
“You could do it, Hoss.”
“You could do it just as well, brother; huh uh, not me.”
“Guess we ought ‘a let him go then. We don’t have any way to carry him.”
“Aw, that’s the biggest dang frog I ever seen! But, better let him go; maybe we can come back tomorrow with a bucket, catch him again.”
Adam laughed as he let go of the frog, who jumped into the water quickly resulting in a big splash. He turned to Hoss and led him by the shoulders back to the horses. He knew his Pa would be upset at their lateness, but he relished the feeling of just playing once again. He thought of Judy and the times they had played at this same creek, catching frogs, splashing around. He listened to his little brother’s banter, and smiled to himself as he headed off towards the ranch.
***********
“DON’T TELL ME YOU WERE KEPT AFTER SCHOOL AGAIN!” Ben shouted as the boys entered the house, their laughing ceasing instantly.
“N...N...No, Pa, me and Adam went down to Mill Creek, hunting frogs. I asked him to go with me after school.”
“You didn’t tell me that was your plan this morning!”
“I didn’t’ know, Pa; see, me and Adam worked together on this assignment today. I thought it would be something fun to do.”
“Sorry, Pa, we knew we’d only be a little late; we didn’t spend much time there. Didn’t mean to worry you,” Adam spoke up, walking past his father to head upstairs.
“Hold it right there, young man. You know better than to go somewhere without letting someone know where you’re headed. You could have endangered yours as well as your brother’s lives. What if you had gotten hurt in some way?”
“Pa, we just felt like having a little fun today. By the time we rode here to talk to you, it would a been too late to go back to Mill Creek.”
“THEN YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE GONE!”
“Gee Pa, we sure are sorry. You should’ve seen the size of the frog Adam caught, I ain’t ever seen one like it,” Hoss said, stepping in, hoping to cool off the situation.
“Boys, you’re home! Hurry on upstairs to wash up, dinner will be ready soon.” Marie came downstairs carrying a smiling Little Joe with her.
“I AM NOT FINISHED WITH THIS DISCUSSION YET!”
Adam and Hoss stopped as quickly as they had started up the stairs upon hearing their mother’s words.
“Ben, I would like to speak with you outside for a moment. Adam, take Little Joe with you up to your room please.”
“MARIE, I...” Ben was interrupted by an icy glare from his wife. Her temper was raising and her face was reddening. He walked towards the door swinging it open roughly.
Adam, grabbing little Joe, pushed Hoss up the stairs.
************
“Ben, you are being awful hard on that boy lately. You call this making yourself available to him? If you want him to be able to speak to you, then you can’t go about yelling the way you do!”
“He was threatened with SUSPENSION!”
“And you dealt with it. Now why are you shouting at the boys for simply heading to the creek? Maybe they should have asked permission, but they are boys, and will act as such. I don’t think it will help your and Adam’s relationship with you reacting this way anytime he makes a mistake. He is only fifteen!”
“I expect more from him!”
“WHY?”
“I DON’T KNOW! Maybe because he has always been so thoughtful, responsible, mature. Now all of the sudden he is acting like…like…like a TEENAGER!”
Marie laughed, seeing how Ben realized what he was saying. She wrapped her arms about his waist, and gazed lovingly into his eyes. “He is a teenager, dear; let him be one for a while. I am not saying excuse his behavior, but maybe be a little more understanding of it. Six months ago, we would have been ecstatic if Adam had set about playing. Remember what he was like then, Ben, somber and restless, full of spite. Now, he’s finally opening up. Just take it easy on him, my love.”
“Six months ago…you’re right; he was rather hard to live with. I’ll talk to him, see if maybe we can’t come to an agreement over this new behavior of his.”
“After dinner, dear!”
“Yes, ma’am.”
***********
“So, you caught a big frog huh?” Ben asked, smiling at Hoss, letting them know he was no longer angry.
“Biggest dang frog I’ve ever seen! We tried to find a way to bring him home, but Adam wouldn’t put him in his pants like Joe does!”
Everyone laughed as Little Joe wore a wide grin.
“Pa, you think tomorrow after school, we could head back over there for another chance. We’ll bring Joe along, then we’ll have a way to get him home.” Adam laughed as his brother’s eyes opened wide at the prospect of hunting frogs with his older brother’s.
“Please, Pa! I catch froggies too!” Little Joe said, flashing his bright green eyes in his father’s direction.
“We can all go. We’ll meet you boys at the school; that will save us some time. We’ll bring a picnic along, that way we won’t miss dinner.”
“THANKS PA!” Little Joe and Hoss shouted their excitement.
Adam smiled at his mother, and finished off his plate. “Pa, may I be excused? I have a lot of chores to catch up on.”
“Sure, son, go ahead.”
“Help you with your chores, son?” Ben asked walking out to where his son stood chopping wood.
“Sure Pa, wood still needs stacked. Thanks.”
Ben began stacking the wood his son had chopped; they worked in silence together, working as a team.
“Pa, I’m sorry we didn’t tell you where we were going today; didn’t mean to cause any trouble.”
“It’s fine, son, as long as you don’t do it again. I guess I over-reacted, I know you take good care of your brothers. I’m just getting used to your growing up, I guess I could say.”
“Growing up?”
“You know what I mean, son.”
“No, I don’t, Pa. What do you mean?” Adam stopped chopping and began stacking with his father.
“You know, your feelings for Judy, your actions as of late. You’re just behaving differently. It takes some getting used to.”
“Doesn’t seem to me I’ve changed much. Sure, I’ve gotten in some trouble lately, but it’s not the first time. As for Judy, my feelings may have changed, but since I can no longer even look at her, I guess you won’t have to worry about that anymore.”
Ben studied his son. He saw the way Adam’s body had begun filling out; he was still all limbs, but could tell a few changes. He saw how the boys hair was mussed, a small tuft of raven hair fallen onto his forehead as he worked. He remembered how hard it had been for him when he had fallen in love so young, and his father had pushed hard to end the relationship.
“About that, Adam, I may have been a little hasty. I don’t mind if you speak at school, but other than that, you know you’re not to be alone together.”
“I know, Pa; it’s just that she’s leaving soon for college. I wanted a little more time with her. I was hoping maybe she could join us tomorrow at the creek. You and Marie will be there. Please, Pa.”
“Adam I…,” Ben paused, rethinking his conversation earlier with his wife. “Alright, but only with her father’s permission.”
“YES SIR! Thanks Pa.”
“Let’s go in, son; it’s getting pretty late.”
Ben watched his son walk into the house, hoping he had done the right thing. At least this way he could watch them together and decide just how worried he should be.
***********
Adam rode quickly to the school, excited at the prospect of he and Judy having more time together. He tied up his horse, hearing Hoss chastise him for riding so quickly. He ignored his brother’s complaint and hurried into the school.
“JUDY, GUESS WHAT!” Adam exclaimed, kneeling next to her desk.
“What is it Adam? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so excited!”
“Pa said we could all go to Mill Creek today. Hoss and Joe are gonna hunt frogs;
he said you could come along.”
“Really? Why the change of heart?”
“I’m not sure really. So what do you say?”
“Of course I’ll come. I’ll ride over after school and let my father know; you’ll wait for me won’t you.”
“I’ll ride with you!”
“Take your seats please. Open your readers to page twelve.” Mrs. Kindle stood in front of the class, watching Adam and Judy closely. Adam got into his seat and opened his reader; this was going to be a long day. He couldn’t wait for school to be over.
***********
“You are dismissed for lunch. Adam, I would like to see you please.”
The class filed out. Adam wondered what this was about. He had paid close attention all morning. “Yes Ma’am?”
“Adam, I wanted to talk to you about your assignment yesterday. I saw you working together with Hoss; you finished rather quickly. You made a few mistakes, but I noticed on Judy’s paper, the same mistakes were made. You both mixed up the same three countries. That seems like quite a coincidence, don’t you think?”
“Yes, ma’am, it is a coincidence. What three did I mix up?”
“Here, I’ll show you. Now would you explain how you and Judy managed to make the same mistakes?”
“I don’t know, ma’am; we weren’t working together.”
“No, but you were working beside each other. So was it you looking off of her paper, or her looking off yours?”
“Are you saying we were cheating, Mrs. Kindle? That’s an awful hasty accusation, isn’t it, without some sort of proof.”
“The proof is on the paper, Adam. If you are unwilling to admit your actions, then I will have a meeting with both of your fathers so we get down to the truth of the matter.”
“Well, you just have your meeting then, Mrs. Kindle. I did not cheat!”
“Have it your way, then; I will ride out to your father’s tonight.”
“No need; he’s coming here after school. You can speak to him then. May I be excused please!” Adam’s anger was showing plainly on his face. He was worried; he knew Judy had looked off his paper, but he would take the blame if it came down to it. He went outside and stalked off to find Judy. He had to warn her of what was to come.
***********
“Adam, why is Mrs. Kindle gonna talk to Pa?”
“Let it be, Hoss; it’s none of your business.”
“You ain’t gonna get suspended, are you?”
“Don’t know; now quiet. Here comes Pa now.”
“Ready, boys?” Ben asked smiling down at his son’s. His smile turned quickly to a frown when he noticed the tears in Hoss’ eyes.
“Mrs. Kindle wants to speak with you, Pa. Judy rode off to get her father; she wanted to see you together.”
“What is this about, Adam?”
“Ask her. I’ll go sit with Joe.”
“Adam?”
Adam ignored his father and climbed into the wagon with Little Joe. He sat quietly, knees up, fists on his chin.
Little Joe scooted towards him and placed a small hand on his shoulder. “It okay, Adam. We catch froggies.”
Adam met his brother’s smile, and turned his eyes away from his mother’s questioning glance.
***********
“Mr. Cartwright, I am so glad you came in today. After Mr. Wright arrives, we can talk of the matter I called you in for today.”
“What is this about, Mrs. Kindle? Is Adam acting up again? I spoke with him the other night about his behavior; I am surprised that he is having trouble again.”
“Acting up, I would say. He is walking a line of disrespect, honestly. I have warned him of he and Judy’s relationship, and am met many times with a look of contempt.”
“He has been disrespectful towards you?” Ben asked incredulously, Adam was raised better than to disrespect a teacher.
“Not with words, only in manner. Here comes Mr. Wright now. Mr. Wright, please come in, have a seat. I will get straight down to business. Here is the assignment from yesterday. The children worked together to create a map of the world. Hoss and Adam completed this map, Judy and Margaret worked together on this map. If you look closely, they both only missed three countries on the maps. Look closer and you will notice it is the same three, in the same order. I will let you draw your own conclusions.”
“Mrs. Kindle, this could be a coincidence. Adam would never cheat on an assignment.”